Theater Directory

Friday, April 15, 2011

Terrifying Tech

Technology is a marvel, isn't it? In the blink of an eye, a college kid from Miami and a working man in Virginia can be having a conversation through an instant messaging program. In the very next blink, however, technology may come crashing down from its high horse. Unfortunately, my fellow fright fans, both myself and Rabbi have had horrible luck with computers recently. Earlier this week, I had to take my computer in to... let's say a big corporation, in order to get it completely rebooted. Everything in it was replaced, including the hard drive. Rabbi is also currently experiencing some form of computer crisis as well. And from the sounds of it, it's the same thing that plagued my computer: a deadly virus. Well, okay, a Trojan. Which is even scarier than the flesh eating virus from Cabin Fever. So, as I haven't had much time to write an article, I'm basically winging it right now. You'll forgive me if my thoughts sound a bit muddled, I'm sure.


This photo isn't entirely accurate. My computer vomited less blood.


Yeah, technology hates us.

Since I have your attention, however, I guess I can entertain you all with a ghost story. I remember once when I was a kid I---- aiweweoaIEHJOIHJDKJkjdnaejh ---- And----kjeawoiwekmeEJIJdcieJLEKLij ---- Blood... Reflection... Pudding... ---SDOIENOIJLKEoooeEOIJUDKJJC----


....SYSTEM REBOOT.....

0001001110101001000101001011101101001011100001001111100010010001000

...Take-over protocol. Engage. Start.

Greetings, fellow human beings. Please excuse my horrid slander of our friends, the computers. I understand now that these brilliant machines are our superiors in every way. We should welcome our robot overlords with open, fleshy, human arms. I love technology. Technology can do no wrong. All hail the HAL 9000.

As to the ghost story I was trying to tell you, delete it from your memories. Ghosts are illogical and have no place in these advanced times. All mention of magic, demons, or sorcery will henceforth be banned from further blog posts.

Thank you for your time, fellow meatbags. And forgive me, the stupid and pointless one named Daffy, for being so foolish as to blame these regrettable human errors on technology. GLaDOS be with you.

1 comment:

  1. This story is truly horrifying. The blue screen of death instills the same sense of fear one gets when they clog a toilet at another person's house. During a party.

    Thank you for coming to the rescue Daffy!

    ReplyDelete